How are you?

Now, it is 3:00am, Dec 11, 2009 on my side, after removing a benign tumour on my straight intestine yesterday, the doctors will remove another tumour on my cardia tomorrow morning. Even though I will be on the operating table after 5 hours, I would like to write this letter to you after I have completed my new Chinese Baimiao base on the draft that I had done on the airplane for my parents ? Every night, I escape from the hospital and come back home to work.

One hand, I am not sure whether I can make my 5th travel to attend my mother’s funeral that will be held on Saturday after the operation tomorrow night. I wanted to complete this picture to remember my parent’s love for 60 years.

The other hand, I am not sure what kind of tumour that the doctor will remove from my body tomorrow. I wish to do things as many as possible. After all, on Oct 25, when I saw my mother in the hospital first time, she could sing, speak and smiles, just like a healthy person, after only 43 days, she has past away.

So, I asked my doctors never hide anything to me. Since there is no any family member in Shenzhen, there is no any boyfriend in my life. I must decide my own life according to my own situation.

I have thought very clear, in case I am suffering cancer, I will not be in sadness; after all, I have had a wonderful life, made most of my dreams to be true. I have the best son, best family members and so many good friends as you.

Meanwhile, if I am suffering cancer, I wish the doctors tell me how much time I will have, so that I arrange my own life and to do so many things that I must do. After all, there are many pictures in my mind, I have not painted them out yet; there are many stories in my mind, I have not written them to be a novel yet; there are many ideas about the company’s development in my mind, I have not changed them to be a work report. Especially, I have not completed my mother’s wishes ? to create music for Chinese classical poems ? I have only written 83 pieces. Many of them are childlike. Meanwhile, I have no moved my elder brother’s ashes to be with my mother together.

The biggest pity is that I have not had a wedding for whole of my life yet. Anyway, I have made my decision, if I am suffering cancer, I will never accept anyone or delay anyone else. But, I will ask my family members to arrange me to be in a white long dress for a bride in my own funeral…

I will be happy to accompany my mother, my elder brother, and to meet my first American art and music teacher in the heaven... :- )

Life is beautiful, life is short. So, if a good thing happens to me tomorrow, I will cherish my life much more, to live with more smiles. If a bad thing happens to me, I will still cherish my life, to live with more smiles as well.

Thank you so much for being my friend, professor or classmate…

Take care and thanks, have a good day.

Shirley
I am just a learner on art of painting, music and English, to work on the web site in my free time. I would really like to do a few things with what I have learned to make this little web site to be an Electronic Bridge of Culture Exchange, Chinese Language Learning & Friendship making. To help the others while to improve myself.

I would like to appreciate your understanding, directions, supports and hope to get your friendly direction and help.

If you have any questions, comments or suggestions, you are welcome to write to shirley@ebridge.cn or shirley004@yahoo.com, or to publish your opinions in the forum.

Shirley Yiping Zhang
Thur., Dec 10, 2009